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CONGRATULATIONS !
A committed, sanctified relationship with another person has, over the ages, been seen
as the best way to provide a sound basis of parenting and preparing children, as a means
of providing each other with mutual support and care over a lifetime, and providing the
economic means and supporting services for both parties to enjoy a better quality of life
than could be had separately.
Clearly, the most important element in the decision to get married is the choice of a
partner.
There is no one set of characteristics that define the “right” partner,
but the experience of those who have enjoyed long lasting marriage relationships
suggest a number of important considerations:
The first is commitment. There will certainly be difficulties and changes over
the course of your marriage. It may seem easier to walk away, rather than cope, adjust,
forgive, and labor. A commitment to making the relationship work will get you through
the difficult times - if you mean it.
Second is compatibility. Is he/she your best friend?
Would they be, if you weren’t getting married? Are you just alike/complete opposites – either
can work.
Do you know him/her well enough to have learned their
faults, short-comings, limitations? Are you prepared to accept them as they
are? Couples become more like one another over time, but you can’t predict
or count on change to make a relationship work.
Have you discussed fully and honestly and worked through your expectations for
your marriage? How many children, when? Where to live, etc.?
Are you both committed to maintaining a degree of social and economic
independence, while for the most part forming a partnership for the common benefit of
both of you?
If one of you has substantially more wealth coming into the
relationship, you may want to consider the benefits to both of you from a
pre nuptial agreement. |